Today’s topic is about Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It? Let’s see. Nature has given us only joy. This sorrow is our search. The happiness of two moments which is going to make you very sad in the coming tomorrow should be discarded like poison today. Don’t expect so much, this heart, here every person has a different world of his own. There are very few people in the world Whatever they are, they look like that. To maintain a relationship, there should be purification of heart, not intellect.
If there is life in the feet, then the destination is not far and if there is a place in the heart, then it is not far away from you. Anger comes not on him but on myself, why did I love him so much? You are searching for success, it is your fault, you start working and working hard with a sincere heart. Success will follow you, searching for you. Everyone tested me but no one understood me. Coins are precious and faith is cheap, here the meaning of a relationship is the relationship of selfishness. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?
|1.||When Too Much Attachment Will Only Hurt Then This Will Help You|
|2.||The Attachment Theory and Solution?|
|3.||How To Get Rid Of Attachment?|
|4.||Science Behind Of Attachments|
When Too Much Attachment Will Only Hurt Then This Will Help You
- It is impossible to love and be more intelligent at the same time. Any relationship, when instead of cleaning the tears, it starts giving tears, then understands that that relationship has completed its age.
- You keep making your identity silently, the wind itself will hum your name.
- You just remain pure in character, then no one has enough strength to point a finger at you.
- Instead of winning someone by debate, defeat them by silence. Because those who are always ready to argue with you can never tolerate your silence.
- Must fight for respect but do not support unrighteousness.
- Must fight for rights, but do not be tempted by those on which you do not have rights.
- Without faith neither love is possible nor prayer is possible.
- One should also endure, one should also say, and one should also live with peace in life.
- Mother is the one one who can take everyone’s place, yet no one can take her place.
- We are that boat, which has no shore, we all belonged, but no one has become ours
- Know how he wrote the book of fate, gives counting breath, and writes countless wishes.
- Even though I don’t have performances in the character. There is honesty, there is pride, but not stupid.
- One should move forward in life with time, otherwise, memories hurt throughout life.
- Mistakes are not needed to break the relationship, as soon as the selfishness is fulfilled, the relationship automatically breaks.
- If you bow down once to save the relationship, then people take the wrong misunderstanding that it will bow every now and then.
- When someone cheats on others, he fights with them, when someone cheats on his loved ones, then the person becomes silent.
- Thinking that there should be no rift in the relationship, we have never considered anything bad about you.
- Talk sweetly in front and keep away from such a friend who spoils the work behind the back. It is as if poison is filled inside and nectar is filled from above.
- You will see one dream, the difficulties will come a thousand, but that scene will be very beautiful when your success will make noise. Only those who think of change instead of revenge reach the heights.
- The person who has good thinking and intentions, God definitely comes in some form or the other to help him.
- This is Kalyug, where people are less unhappy with their own problems than others’ happiness.
- It is very important to change with time because time teaches us to change, not to stop. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
- When a person is cheated by his own people, he thinks a thousand times before trusting any person.
- A single effort made wholeheartedly is more effective than hundreds of unfulfilled efforts.
- Remember life is not happy, it has to be made happy.
- If God took from you what you could never imagine losing, then surely He will also give you something that you would never have thought of getting it.
- When a disease occurs in thinking itself, then a person remains unconscious even in his senses.
- Stop treating everyone as good, because people are not what they are actually.
- How strange is the lie, it feels good if you speak for yourself, and if someone else speaks, you get angry.
- If difficulties come in life, do not be sad because difficult roles are always given to good actors.
- How strange this world is here, not by telling lies, but by speaking the truth, relationships are broken.
- When we accidentally like the wrong person at first and then get sad and then because of this when we meet nice people, we stop trusting him/her.
- By not treating someone the way they treat you, treat them as you are because your identity is your behavior.
- Good friends are like stars who may not be visible in the light but always support in difficult situations.
- Those who are good at heart, selfish people take advantage of them fiercely.
- A liar’s loud voice silences the genuine person, but a real person’s quiet shakes a liar’s roots.
- To look settled from the outside, you have to mess up a lot from the inside. When I got acquainted with the world, I came to know that it is not so important to have a conscience in the body as it is necessary to have money in the pocket.
- The one who does not believe it is necessary to give you time. What do you think? Will he accompany you?
- While suffering pain, a person comes to that point that every new pain starts feeling small.
- When time takes a turn, it does not make bets but changes live.
- If someone remains silent, it does not mean that he is an idiot, he does not know anything, I have seen the wise speak less and the fool speaks more than necessary.
- You are lucky that someone believes in you, cares about you, and handles your every turn. Sometimes you also support him, not only you always but he also deserves your love.
- There comes a turning point in the life of every person when he feels that now he has understood so much that he does not feel like arguing with anyone, nor does he feel like understanding anyone.
- And in the last stage of life, a person feels that if we wanted to live, we were away from life, and if we wanted to die, we were forced to live. But in any condition live happily because Everything in this world is changeable. Times are also changeable. So be happy. And share happiness. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
The Attachment Theory and Solution? (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
What should be the ideal relationship like? So we always idealize a Bollywood movie or a celebrity couple. But the psychological reality of love and relationship is different. How will your romantic relationship be? Its number one factor depends on your attachment style. There are four types of attachment styles according to psychology. There are (1) Avoidant (2) Anxious (3) Fearful (4)Secure
- Physical Sign of avoidant:
- Avoiding Eye Contact
- So the first type is avoidant. Normally avoidant is unable to make an emotional connection. Such people do not want to show any of their emotions. And want to avoid any emotional movement.
- For example, if we look at the physical sides of the avoidant, then whenever the avoidant faces a physical movement, he tries not to keep eye contact with that person on that movement.
- Avoiding Physical Touch
- The second example is that in normal emotional movement, we use physical touch or hands or hug to comfort the other. But avoidant avoids physical connection in such movement. Apart from this, whenever the avoidant makes a romantic connection, he is more involved in the beginning face. So he reduces the involvement with his partner so that a deep emotional connection cannot be formed. That’s why the avoidant initially is very charming. But in a long-term relationship, he can disappoint you.
- The avoidant also often uses humor whenever anyone tries to be emotionally open in front of him.
- Apart from this, sometimes he also tries to embarrass the other person if he tries to dispense his emotions.
- According to psychology, all attachment styles form in childhood. Because if seen, something happened in childhood that due to which he relates the emotional connection with the pen. For example parents, if they are physically available but emotionally unavailable, for the child, or if the parents are so busy with their work that they have not been able to make any emotional connection with their child, then the child’s avoidant attachment style form can be is. Or the positive thing is that you can change this type of attachment style with your own efforts. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
- Avoiding Eye Contact
- The first and easiest way is that you can express to the person whom you trust the most in your life, how important they are in your life and how much you love and respect them. You can do it by letter, email, message, but the best way is if you tell this thing in front of the eye to eye.
- By opening up
- you learn how to handle emotions
- and open about your intentions
- The second type is Anxious. The anxious type is completely different from the avoidant type. Meaning Anxious avoids losing any emotional connection. That is why they cannot live without a romantic relationship. Even if he comes out of a romantic relationship, then he gets involved quickly in another relationship after relationship. Its psychological reason is that Anxious feels that not being in an intimate relationship is equal to death. Anxious, share their feeling with their partner like “I cannot live without you, or else I need you”. An anxious type is seen in movies and romantic songs. Unconsciously, the anxious type keeps expressing his/her own pain in order to control his/her partner so that the partner does not give up on her/him.
- Sometimes Anxious type resorts to self-harm to control their partner. Self-harm is romantically portrayed in Most Bollywood films but in real life, it can be psychologically toxic to any human being. To fall madly in love with any person without knowing it. If you do this too, then it is because of the psychologically, anxious that when someone is attracted to someone, he immediately starts idealizing him. Meaning they think that the person is perfect. Because of his own low self-esteem, he is unable to see the shortcomings of others. That is why he becomes ready to change anything or to do anything in himself.
- However, because of his anxious low self-esteem, subconsciously he also thinks that how can that perfect person be in a relationship with them? And even if it is, it will not last long and that is why even if he is in a relationship, then he is very possessive. Eventually, this all turns into doubt and suspension, and Anxious automatically suffocates his partner and drives them away.
- The obviously anxious attachment style also takes form in childhood. There can be many reasons behind this. But the main reason is that if you have lost a primary caretaker in childhood or if you have received inconsistent emotional attention in childhood or you have seen inconsistent emotional behavior of your parents. So you can form an anxious attachment style. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
The easiest way to get out of this is to follow any hobby or passion in your life that has no connection with your relationship. By doing this, you can protect your identity and you do not depend on any person or relationship for your self-worth. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
- The third type is fearful, this is the most complex type of attachment style. But according to statistics, only 2% of the population is found in this category. Fearful have an avoidant characteristic of both Avoidant and Anxious.
- That’s why he behaves unpredictably in any relationship. He wants a relationship or emotional connection in his life but whenever someone comes to him, he goes into extreme anxiety and behaves like an avoidant. Normally fearful sees himself and his potential partner negatively. And that is why he neither trusts himself emotionally nor his partner.
- That’s why the avoidant is always in extreme excitement in his relationship. If you know a person who cannot be stable in any relationship and sometimes he becomes violent in his relationship then it may be that that person is fearful. In most cases, fearful attachment is created due to childhood trauma. If a person has been physically, sexually, or verbally abused in his childhood, then he feels that he cannot trust any person and cannot expect love from anyone, that is why he forms a fearful attachment. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
There is only one way to get out of such a situation and that is to take professional help means to take the help of any psychotherapist to recover from your situation. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
- The last and best attachment type is Secure. Secure are comfortable with their own emotions and also comfortable being vulnerable in front of others.
- They believe in themselves that no matter what the emotional situation is, but they will take care of themselves. Apart from this, when another person is emotionally open in front of a secure type of person, then they are able to handle them well. Such people are not even afraid of conflict and consequences. Meaning if there is any problem in the relationship or if their partner has made any mistake then they communicate this thing comfortably in a calm and honest way.
- Normally, because of the consistent emotional support and love received from their primary caretakers in childhood, the secure type is unable to subconsciously relate their romantic relationship with any past trauma And because of this, he is able to see every relationship in a new way as it is.
- That is why whenever a secure meets someone, he does not focus on whether there is an emotional connection between them or not, but in this, he focuses on how much reliability, understanding, honesty is there in this connection. And that is why most of the time such people are right in emotional judgment and can create a secure environment in their relationship. If you are of the secure type then this is good news for you. But the most important thing is that we cannot categorize any human being 100%.
- It is possible that there are some characters in you who are of the avoidant and anxious type. But you can make yourself a secure type with your effort and conscious resistance. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
How To Get Rid Of Attachment? (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
- Why is it that the person whom you love the most, the person whom you consider to be yours the most, that person gives you the most pain? hurts the most? Actually, the answer to the question lies in this question itself.
- Like you considered someone as yours, is it mine or is it mine, just the problem has started. The person who is not yours, the thing which is not yours can never hurt you. Wherever you keep this feeling that it is mine, it is mine, wherever you put authority, you can never get happiness from there. From there you start getting sorrow. No person walking on the path can give you sorrow. can’t hurt you. Your right over a person is mine. It is not the people who use hashtags these days #mine, # you are mine. This is the only problem of all your troubles. that you accepted it as yours. Many people ask that we even know that the person in front does not have the same feelings for us, then what should we do? Can’t leave it even if you want? Even if we want, we are not able to separate from him because we have to suffer a lot.
- You suffer because you consider him your own. Keep one thing in your heart, the day you will consider that person as a stranger that he is not mine, he is not mine, then do not believe the truth that even if he comes and stands in front, you will not make any difference. Right now you will make a difference in everything from him that he ignores us, does not love us, does not respond to our call messages, that person because you sit on him as your own, you sit on him by accumulating authority. What is yours will automatically tell you “I am yours”, you don’t need to say “you are mine”. Let me tell you the truth that unless you are yours, no one can be yours.
- Unless you know how to take care of yourself, no one can be yours. First of all, be yourself. And secondly, nowadays people have a lot of problems in the relationship. And people do not understand whether to stay in this relationship or leave this relationship so understand one thing that “relationship is not easy”, Maintaining a relationship was not easy. Nowadays what has happened in the age of online is that when we order something, it reaches us quickly. We order food, it reaches us in half an hour. There are so many online companies that we order products, that goods reach our house. But relationships are not like this, they take time. Whatever deep things of life are there, it takes time to achieve them. If a person wants to become a doctor, engineer, then he has to give a good part of his life to that thing. If you want to become the CEO of a company, then you will have to work hard and give that much time. Whatever deep things are in life, it demands time, you want to be famous, if you want to become a star, then it will take time, so there are relationships like this, they take time.
- It takes time to understand each other, so don’t be in a hurry, don’t depend too much on anyone, you. And don’t think that she is mine or she is mine, then she has to do it for me. Know that when you sit on someone with authority, then whatever the person does for you, you do not feel thank you for it, it seems that he should do so. If your handkerchief falls on the way and your wife picks it up and gives it to you, then you do not feel a sense of thanks, if a stranger picks up and gives it to you, then you feel a sense of thanks. When you start considering someone as your own, then whatever that person does for you, you do not see it. You think he has to do this, if he is doing this then it is not a big deal, if he doesn’t then it feels bad why he didn’t do it. The problem is not in your love, the problem is in accepting someone as your own whether he is mine or he is mine. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
Science Behind Of Attachments (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)
A person built a very beautiful house, invested all the capital of his life in that house and it was the most beautiful house in the whole city. Many people used to come to buy his house but he never said yes. One day suddenly his house caught fire. And for him, it was not just a home. When that house caught fire, he felt as if he had died. Seeing his house burning, he also jumped into that house, so people stopped him, what do you do? The man started crying by beating his chest. This house was my everything. I loved this house very much, I have put everything in this house, I have put everything for this. Now, this house will no longer exist, so what will I do?
So someone came and told why do you cry? Yesterday your son has made a deal for this house, as soon as he heard that my son has made a deal for this house, all weeping stopped. As soon as his son came, he hugged his son and said that son today you saved me from dying. Today I am feeling so proud of you, I am feeling so proud as never in my life. Today there is a fire in this house and you have done the deal for this house only yesterday, then he said, Father, first listen to me, I must have gone to do the deal but the deal is not completed yet. As soon as that person heard that the deal was not done yet. He started crying again beating his chest. what changed?
First, he was crying because the house is mine, then he became silent because that house has belonged to someone else. But when he came to know that the house is still mine, he started crying back. How many people die in the world? You don’t get hurt. No matter how many accidents happen, you don’t mind. There will be so many people in your life who do not answer your calls, messages many times. You don’t care because you don’t consider them as yours, this is mine, this is mine. So the problem is not in your love, it is your feeling that this is mine, this is mine, it must be done for me, this thing hurts you.
This is what hurts you. So does it mean not to consider anyone as one’s own? Well, it is better that you do not consider anyone as your own. But you remember one thing which will be your own, it will never torment you. Truly, whoever is your own, you will never get pain from him. (Attachment Issues In Relationships | How To Fix It?)